I've been 19 or a while now. I actually want to blog about this exactly on my birthday. But surprise surprise, I didn't. ;p
1. Save money
Saving money is a real challenge especially when you're a teenager. You want to buy this and that. You just can't control yourself especially when you really want something. It has been a challenge to me ever since I transferred schools. Back then, I receive my allowance daily but when I transferred schools, away from home, my mom had to give me weekly allowance. So I had to budget everything. And I have to allot money for emergencies. If I'm feeling generous, I allot more money for food. I was too scared to run out of cash so I guess that's why I could save a lot every week. I'm keeping this up! Hopefully, if I could save a lot more I could buy books and gadgets I want. :)
2. Travel more
You see, I have this plan to travel around the world. Okay, a lot of people have this plan! Definitely. I mean, who wouldn't want to see cherry blossoms in Japan? Eiffel tower in Paris? Central park in New York? Okay, those places are very common (haha)... So I'd like to see more! I'd like to see more of the culture a country could give. Anyway, I have traveling plans once I graduate from college and settle for a job. I would go to countries one by one, eat their local food, take pictures of every detail I see and share them with everyone. Hopefully, I could see the world with someone special (okay, wish ko lang)! (By the way, I'm going to South Korea and US this summer vacation, hihi pa-segway lang, excited me)
3. Attempt to commit
This isn't really a top priority. Actually, I included this because I just wanted to share how confused I am. I think I mentioned on some posts that I've been having problems on committing in a relationship. I don't know if I'm scared or I'm just not interested. There are guys I take interest in but it's never serious. Same old high school crush thing then I get over it once I'm preoccupied with something else. I'm forever "I'm never gonna have a boyfriend!" I practically ignore even cute guys. I'm like, why am I like this? Forever, "umayos ka Bea ha!" I just wanted to share, hahaha, I guess I'm more into enjoying my life? And having a relationship is at the very bottom of my priorities. (PS: my mom's worried I won't have a boyfriend and I would be single forever, so she's pushing me to have one, *ignore ignore ang peg ko haha)
4. Journal/Diary writing
I have a lot of journals! I received three journals from different people at the start of this year (and I still have a lot unused ones from last year)! I already used two of them. And I can't keep it up! It's a bad habit of mine. I like to type things on my itouch or my laptop instead of writing by hand on journals and stuff. And if I do write something, I would, on a scratch paper and I wouldn't know where to find it in my messy room. I like to keep journals so I would like to also use it well. Hopefully, I could fill them up with my thoughts, my rants and my dreams. Hopefully.... I'm trying and trying!!
5. Study more
See! I always include this on my top priorities or my to-do list. I'm actually 'learning' to study more (sounds so weird). Again, it's because when I transferred schools, I learned to be independent. I only depend on myself especially on school requirements. Back then, I have friends who could help me with my subjects. I transferred schools without knowing anyone. And since I'm an irregular student (meaning I have classes with other batches and other courses) I need to constantly make new friends (which is the upside) but then I need to constantly study by myself because my blocmates wouldn't know what my other classes are all about. I also have to be responsible and take down whatever requirements I need to do. (hay, better student na ba ako? haha)
6. Aim higher
I'm more of the go-with-the-flow kind of girl. I just accept whatever it is given to me. I never try hard and wish for something more. But I want this 'attitude' of mine to change. So I want to aim higher for things I want. Like if I want this grade, I should aim for a better one.
7. Fix relationships
I'm the type of person who makes friends but can't keep them. Like, they're my friends now but after sometime, they're just not anymore. The falling apart process is so fast with me and I don't know why. I have a lot of close friends back in high school but I just don't understand why I'm not talking to them anymore. I don't understand why I don't even have the effort to talk to them and ask them how they're doing or whatever it is that's been going on in their lives. And I really really want to change this. I want to maintain my friendship with people. (yeah, actually sometimes when I get depressed I don't know who to talk to because I don't know if I can talk to them)
8. Bake more
Yes! I've been baking a lot ever since I transferred schools. I think I mentioned that in one of my blog posts. I haven't been doing this for years. Just a few cupcakes and cakes but never really experimenting or getting out my comfort zone. My dream of having my own pastry shop is just getting bigger. I have this clearer vision of how it would look like and what pastries I would sell. This dream is that driving force that's pushing me to get out and experiment more. :)
9. Dress up more
I am
so lame at dressing up. My fashion sense is zero. Hahaha. A part of me thinks that everything I'd wear wouldn't look good on me because I'm fat (particularly my legs, ehem ehem). I don't know anything about clothes complementing your size or shape or whatever. And I don't even know how to do my own make-up. And the reason why I want to know these how-to is because of my course! And because I know I need it for applying jobs. I just wish I have more self-confidence so I wouldn't hold back when I buy clothes (out of my comfort zone)
10. Pray more
I'm not your usual Sunday mass visitor but I do pray every night (again, ever since I transferred schools). And this is quite an achievement considering back then, I don't pray at all unless I'm with a group of people who prays before eating. I really do want to be close to God more. And I'm actually starting to read the Bible (which my cousin, Kuya Mico, gave me, thank you). (not a lie, I do read the Bible nowadays)
11. Write more
Oh, hello blog. My blog's haunting me. Every. Single. Day. (kidding) but compared to the blog posts I have last year (and the year before) and to the blog posts I have now, I know I'm not even going to reach half of it at this rate. My problem isn't just my blog though. The journals and fanfics I have. I need to update them! No, not need. I really do want to update them but I just can't find my muse. Where are you, my muse? I hope to find you soon.
12. Read more
Yes yes, I want to challenge myself on reading like... 50 different books every year? (impossible but let me try). But you see, whenever I read a book, I don't keep track on when or whether I finish it so I wouldn't really know how many I've read. Hahaha, crazy. Anyway, I know I've been missing a lot of good books lately so... I wish I could read more. I wish I would have time to read more. (patiently waiting for The House of Hades, ehem ehem) *fingerscrossed hashtagilovebooksinfinitely
13. Watch more musicals
My mom and I watched
The Sound of Music last year. There had been good plays shown here consecutively that time! Aside from
The Sound of Music, there's also
The Phantom of the Opera and
The King and I. Plays or musicals aren't the only thing I want to watch. I also wanted to watch Cirque du Soleil when they had shows in the Philippines. (I went to Las Vegas but sadly, I didn't get to watch it.)
14. Be friendly
I easily get annoyed and irritated. And if I do get annoyed with a person, it takes time before I get friendly with them again. Because if I am irritated/annoyed, it's hard to pretend I'm not and be normal with them. So I want to at least try and control my temper management especially nowadays. (Don't know why but I get more annoyed than I usually do back then)
15. Socialize more
So... believe it or not, I do get shy sometimes. Especially when I meet new people. But because I transferred schools and my schedule's not normal, I get to meet a lot of people from different colleges. So I want to socialize more and know how to deal with people more. This is one of my weakness. I easily get awkward with people because I usually do not know what to do or say in awkward situations. Being an ice breaker isn't a talent of mine.
16. Be happy
I am absolutely doing this right now. Ehehe, I just don't want to spread bad vibes. I don't want to get sad or lonely because it makes me very depressed. So I want to be always happy. It's not impossible to be happy. Just think of happy thoughts and be thankful with what you have. I guess one of the main reasons why people have problems being happy or being positive is because they are not content with what they have. Accept things with what they are. I learned that the hard way but I think it's worth it if it makes life worth living.
17. No tear prevention
Okay, I know after 'be happy', this is confusing. I just wanted to say that if you want to cry, just cry. Because it makes it more relieving. If you cry, at least after sometime it would calm you down because everything that made you sad, you released them by crying. (I don't know for you but this works so great with me)
18. Spend more time with my family
Because I'm not there during the weekdays, I made it a habit to not stay in my room. I roam around the house and do whatever. I'm more of a homebody nowadays. I don't really know why I don't want to go out of the house like back then. Hahaha, usually, it takes a lot of persuasion before I get out of our house.
19. Enjoy life
And I am enjoying my life! Ehehe, examples are right here in my blog! Watch out for my random adventures and whatnot. :D
